


Picture Perfect Lies

by OneHarlowPierce



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AU, F/M, Fury is a sneaky bastard, Natasha Feels, No Civil War please, Pietro is alive, Steve Feels
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-04-06
Packaged: 2018-05-30 01:29:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6403138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneHarlowPierce/pseuds/OneHarlowPierce
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-AoU: She's a Spy. He's a Soldier. Nick Fury thinks they are the perfect babysitters for an enhanced baby, but having Black Widow and Captain America living in the suburbs?. What could possibly go wrong? AU. <br/>Also on FFN.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

NEW YORK CITY.

It should have been a lazy morning. It was her day off, which meant she could sleep in, watch nonsense on TV and do nothing. Clint was away bothering his wife for once; she had no SHIELD assignments and no paperwork to fill out. She was free.

Or so she thought.

Nick Fury had requested her immediately. So she walked out of her apartment and jumped on her slick, black Corvette. The drive to The Avengers facility wasn't far, but it was rush hour and she was getting tired by the second as she waited for the lines of cars to move.

Needless to say, Fury was less than impressed by her tardiness.

"You are late"

"You didn't told the rest of the New York population I had to be here fast" Natasha Romanoff retorted, sitting across from him and eyeing Steve Rogers as he sat next to her. She found it odd, since they rarely worked on solo assignments anymore, but decided to let Fury explain.

"As you are aware, Rogers and Stark were sent on a mission to Russia. HYDRA had a genetic lab down there that was successfully shut down" Fury stated, walking around his desk and touching it, which caused the room to go slightly dark as digital blinds obscured the office… "But there was a little complication it seems…"

She saw Steve squirming in his seat next to her and she was trying not to smirk at it. There was nothing more amusing that Steve Rogers being uncomfortable. Unfortunately, it only added to her curiosity. What was she called in for?

"It turns out, Pietro and Wanda Maximoff weren't the only ones they tampered genetics with. In fact, we found disturbing records that showed they tried, for three years, to create not only adults, but children like them, without success" She grimaced at that, because Fury's voice told her those children didn't have a happy ending and she might have been the Black Widow, but she was still sensitive with children. "But they tried again this year, and apparently they succeeded. And by that I mean, the child has yet to show any sign of what they had done to it. Stark and Cho are already working on figuring everything out"

"Okay, that's great but would you please get to the point? I do wish to spend my day off relaxing before jumping into Avenger mode again"

"I'm afraid neither you nor Rogers will be tending to Avengers missions for a while" Natasha was about to refute but Fury's glare kept her mouth shut. "The child needs someone to care for him, and you both are the only ones I trust to do it. If he's taken away from us and lands back in HYDRA's hands… Just imagine what they could do with a child as young and this one Natasha. Look what they did with you, with Barnes, with the twins… He needs to be guarded and my top agents are in charge. So there is that"

Fury has lost his mind. She was Natasha Romanoff. Black Widow. One of the world's greatest spies. She could destroy someone as easily as Stark with his suit or Rogers with his shield and all she had to do was smile. But she was NOT a babysitter. Let alone to a genetically enhanced child.

"Why don't you have Stark look after it with Pepper? Or Hill? Hell… Carter might be willing to do it. Or Cli-"

"You are doing it and that's it, Romanoff. There is a car waiting on the private parking lot. Maria should be there waiting with the child. The car will drive you to your new makeshift house. It's been set and you have your façade. Go on and make us proud."

She wanted to argue, man didn't she wanted to argue. But she figured it was pointless so she got up and swiftly walked out of the room. She could feel Rogers walking right behind her so she didn't bother hiding her discomfort

"You were oddly quiet, Cap. Don't you see what's wrong with this?" she huffed, getting into the elevator and touching the screen to send it up to the parking lot.

"It is for a good reason. That child is helpless" he reasoned and of course Cap would see it as a sweet sacrifice.

She didn't say anything else, but groaned immediately when they stopped in the parking lot and were greeted by Maria Hill holding a very squirmy, crying child. Steve went to hold him but refrained a second later.

"I might hurt him. Tony was the one that found him and brought him here" He explained, sidestepping Maria and jumping in the car instead. Maria closed her eyes as the child wailed again.

"He's five months old, will be six next week according to Stark. Doesn't have a name except for the code they put on a bracelet. Pepper fed him around two hours ago and you guys have a car seat in there. Here you go" she handed the crying child to Natasha and quickly moved away. If you need anything, call Pepper. Or Fury. Or me as long as it's not to babysit. Good luck"

Natasha frowned as Maria jumped on the elevator and left her alone with the crying- wait. He wasn't crying anymore. In fact, the baby was cuddling to her as she held him. The driver of the car opened the door for her and she jumped in, watching Steve trying to figure out what the car seat was.

"It's a car seat. You have to sit the baby there" she explained "It's supposed to keep the baby safe in case of an accident. Most cars come with it now. Unless it's a sports car"

The baby sighed in her shoulder and she set him on the seat, studying his face for the first time. He was wide awake, staring at her with deep blue eyes and red hair sticking up and she felt her stomach lurch because you had to be extremely cruel to even attempt experimenting on an innocent child like him.

"He seems to like you" Steve commented, and his booming voice caused the child to glance his way. He smiled at Steve before returning his attention to Natasha.

"He likes you too. And he is quite adorable. I can't believe Pepper let him go"

"You are a fool if you think Pepper won't be at that house almost every day"

"I know".


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post-AoU: She's a Spy. He's a Soldier. Nick Fury thinks they are the perfect babysitters for an enhanced baby, but having Black Widow and Captain America living in the suburbs?. What could possibly go wrong? AU.   
> Also on FFN.

The drive to the house was long, and they had been thankful that Pepper put a bottle on the baby's bag to feed him. He had gotten fussy but immediately calmed down and feel asleep once he ate and she rocked him to sleep.

The house itself was big and in a private, secluded neighborhood. It was owned by Tony and Pepper had taken to decorating it perfectly. It had been obviously baby-proofed and recently cleaned.

"Welcome home Mr. Rogers. Ms. Romanoff. I'm here to help. Let me know if you need anything. Or Ms. Potts" Of course they would have FRIDAY here. At least she would help them keep an eye on the child.

"I'll go check the rooms. Are you okay with him?" Steve asked, more out of courtesy than anything else. He had nearly fainted when she suggested he took him out of the car, but did so when he realized all he had to do was pull the seat out and move it with the child in it.

"Yeah go ahead. I got it" she shrugged, grabbing the car seat and heading to the kitchen where she saw plenty of bottles and a note taped to a cupboard.

"He should eat every 4 hours. He's also old enough to eat smashed food. Formula is on the cupboard and there are a few bottles on the fridge ready to go. I'm one videochat away. –Pepper"

She sighed and checked on the child. He was asleep and it wasn't feeding time yet, so she followed Steve upstairs to find her room. She could hear Steve on the far left side of the hallway so she assumed her room would be on the right, and it was. It was decorated in a very simple way, and there was a door that connected to the nursery that had been set up.

She walked there and gently placed the sleeping baby on the crib, brushing his red hair back before exiting the room.

"FRIDAY let me know if he wakes up"

"Of course, Ms. Romanoff"

She walked out of the nursery to find Steve standing across the door, leaning against the wall and looking pretty worried.

"What's wrong now?"

"Fury assigned us to do this. But… I don't know how to take care of a child. I'm a soldier-"

"And I'm a spy. An assassin. But we'll have to figure it out. And when he wakes up, you are feeding him" Steve was about to refute but she glared him into silence.

"FRIDAY, call Pepper. We obviously need to figure out a few things here"

"On it, Ms. Romanoff"

"Is there an office or something in this house?" Steve asked as he followed her down the stairs.

"Mr. Stark has a set up in the basement. It should suffice your needs, Mr. Rogers"

And of course Tony had a laboratory there, too. It was dusty and filled with unfinished Iron Man projects, but it had a semi-conference room they would use.

"I didn't have time to clean up Tony's mess down there, I'm sorry" Pepper's voice came out of a screen and she almost jumped away, almost.

"Yeah well, it could be worst" she replied "So, tell me what is it that we are going to do? Because you need to have a pretty good façade to keep Captain America and Black Widow living in the suburbs and blending in"

"And Fury had Hill worked on that. You are Steven and Natalie Johansson. You've been married for two years and the little one turned up a few months ago. You can choose a name for him if you want to. Steve, you work as my new driver. Nat, if you don't mind falling back to the old days, you are my assistant taking a maternity leave."

"You didn't like me that much back then" she smirked.

"I was in love with Tony and he seemed infatuated with you. I'm sorry"

"Stark liked you?" Steve mused, glancing at her. She ignored him.

"Anyways, I can make it work. How long do you think it should take for us to be out of here?"

"Tony and Helen are working very hard to learn as much from the child as possible. Vision is scanning HYDRA databases and Wanda is getting info from the captured ones. Maybe soon"

"I thought you knew nothing about the Avengers" Steve deadpanned.

"I've learned".

"Alright then, I'll create the fairytale for us. Thank you Ms. Potts."

Pepper had to laugh "You are welcome, Ms. Rushman"

Steve spend most of the day checking the perimeter and learning how Tony's security system worked from FRIDAY, while also memorizing the background story Natasha had created for them. True to her word, she had him feeding the baby and entertaining him as she cooked lunch and dinner. She had put the baby down at around 9, thinking he would sleep through the night, but they couldn't have been more wrong.

He was finally drifting when he heard a very loud wail coming down the hallway. He was up. Again. Obviously they were doing something wrong because it was 2am and the baby was still awake. He got up and walked into the nursery, wincing as the baby's cries rang in his ears.

"I don't know how Clint has dealt with this three times. This is crazy" Natasha grunted as she paced the nursery, bouncing the baby as he cried.

"FRIDAY, can you like… check on him?" Steve wondered, feeling helpless as the baby kept crying. They fed him, bathed him and changed his diaper (Natasha did it all), but he seemed uncomfortable.

"He seems to be perfectly fine, Mr. Rogers. Would you like me to call Ms. Potts?"

"No, no. We'll figure it out. Just… Don't" Natasha snapped, moving towards her bedroom. Steve dragged himself there and plowed onto her bed, feeling exhausted. Looking after a child was not as easy as it seemed, and not even his serum-enhanced body could keep up with this.

"Steve?" Natasha asked, glaring at his sleeping form. She was tired, and she needed to sleep, so she did the one thing Pepper told them not to do. Place the baby on her bed.

"Cooperate, little guy. Please…" She sighed softly, cuddling the baby to her chest.

Steve woke up around 8am feeling something tug at his shirt. His eyes snapped open and he almost jumped out of bed, until he realized it was the baby, sound asleep between him and Natasha. His back was pressed to Nat's stomach and his tiny fist was holding onto his shirt, which made him realize he was too close to Nat, and his right arm was wrapped around her waist.

"Don't move, Cap. He's finally asleep" Natasha whispered, not even opening her eyes, but placing her left hand over the baby's belly.

It was quite a sight. Natasha was not one to show much affection, and after Bruce disappearance it seemed that she was only happy whenever Cooper and Lila called her. She would smile, or laugh, depending on what story Cooper was telling her about his father's latest mishap and on those days she would lay off the soon-to-be Avengers. Just a little bit.

But here she was, half asleep and looking relaxed, albeit tired, hugging a child she was not interested in babysitting less than 24 hours ago.

He felt the baby release his shirt and he carefully got out of bed. He felt guilty for falling asleep on her, so the least he could do was make some breakfast and get a bottle ready for the kid. Besides, it was Monday, and he should be heading to Stark Industries soon. He just hoped he didn't run into any neighbor. He wasn't good at lying, or creating background stories like Natasha was.

He went to his bedroom and took a quick shower before putting on dress pants and shoes and a wife beater and then proceeded to make breakfast for himself and Natasha. Pancakes were the easy way out, and while at it he warmed up the baby's bottle. He seriously needed a name.

"Good Morning, Mr. Rogers. The child has woken up but Ms. Romanoff seems to be in a deep sleep. Do you want me to alert her?" FRIDAY's voice startled him, and he almost dropped the bottle.

"No it's okay. I'll get him"

He sprinted towards Natasha's room and blue eyes settled on him. But there was a problem. He didn't know how to hold him. He had fed him on a high chair and Natasha had always placed him in his arms, he never had to pick him up. He was tiny and fragile and getting fussier by the minute. Natasha had told him he'd have to get over it, because it wouldn't look normal if he refused to hold his own child in public.

"Alright champ, help me out" he mimicked what he saw Nat do the previous day, and he had to admit that it wasn't that bad. Besides, the baby was unharmed.

However, he kept fussing, which Steve assumed it was because he was hungry, so he walked downstairs, cradling the baby close to his chest, just in case. He checked the bottle and decided it was acceptable to feed it to the child.

"FRIDAY, how long should it take for me to get to Stark's?" he asked, sitting on a couch as he fed the baby. He had never felt so normal yet alienated at the same time. This wasn't his life, but holding the baby close to his chest made him feel normal.

"Thirty minutes, sir. Or Forty five minutes or more if we take into consideration the rush hour traffic."

He was sure Pepper could do without him for a while. He wanted to head over to the Avengers facility, but he knew Fury would not be happy about it, so for the day, he would actually be Pepper's driver. He heard a sigh and looked down at the baby. He had finished his bottle, but unlike the day before, he didn't fall asleep.

"You don't feel like napping yet?" he placed the baby on his shoulder and decided walk out and pick up the newspaper.

He saw a few of the neighbors leaving for work, and some of the females were not being shy as they ogled him. It was then that he realized he was only wearing his dress pants and wife beater which was tight on him and the baby was cradled closely to his neck.

"You sure know how to give them a show" Natasha smirked as she walked down the path, wearing a black tank top and shorts and now it was the males ogling at her. "Nothing melts a woman like a father with his baby, especially if said father looks like you"

"You are doing the same" he shrugged, blushing by her comment and passing the baby to her as he bended to pick up the paper. He heard what the girls were saying about him, and he couldn't help but blush even more.

"I bet you can make them moan all the way from here" she smirked, and he knew she was up to something.

"No"

"Kiss me. Smile and come here and kiss me. You are my husband. Kiss me and I'll walk in with him" she grabbed the baby's hand and waved at him. It was funny; he could swear the baby looked just like her.

He walked closer to her, wrapping his arm around her waist as he smiled at the baby, who was content playing with a hair strand of Natasha's new burgundy hair.

"He loves you" he said, and kissed her softly. She was obviously impressed, and he felt a bit proud.

"You've practiced"

"Not really. You caught me off guard that day. Besides, you are my wife now" which reminded him that they needed rings. "I can practice all day long". She laughed and walked back to the house, which allowed Steve to hear the whines of their neighbors, lamenting he was married to someone as hot as him. He chuckled and followed her.

"Pepper called, and she said you could be late. But not late enough her other employees complain" she stated as she sat on a kitchen stool, the baby softly cradled in her arms.

"Because they won't find it odd when Natalie Rushman returns to Stark?"

"As far as they know, I've been handling the European offices. But Tony already made sure all the employees there know me as Natalie, not Black Widow or Natasha Romanoff" the baby cooed, and Natasha smiled at him, which earned her a giggle.

"It comes naturally… to you at least. I have no idea what I'm doing" Steve admitted as he went on to actually cook their breakfast.

"They trained us to be perfect. So we could shift as they needed it. We had to be able to go from a stripper to a babysitter faster than you blink. So we had to be good with kids. I never had to use those skills, and quite honestly, I don't feel bad using them on him. My mission is to protect him; not to hurt him or his parents"

Steve choose to stay quiet, listening as the baby babbled at Natasha "He needs a name. It's only a matter of time before the overbearing neighbor turns up. And we can't introduce him as Baby"

"The best lies are those based on truths" Natasha stated "We should call him Clinton. I can't have kids, but I guess I could return the favor to Barton temporally."

"Clinton Johansson… It sounds like a politician's name. But it'll do" Steve agreed, and passed a plate of pancakes to Natasha "Go ahead, I'll finish dressing up"

He didn't wait for an answer before racing up to his bedroom. He put on his shirt, tie and jacket before combing his hair back. He dyed it brown, and he had grown a beard that he was quite proud of, no matter how many times Sam teased him for it. He could hear the baby fussing downstairs and he closed his eyes, because back in the 40's he would've done anything to have this. The perfect house. The perfect wife. The perfect child. Except this was the 21st century. And Natasha was not his wife. Clinton was not his son and this wasn't his life. Suddenly the baby cried and he realized that he had left Natasha alone with the baby while expecting her to eat. Strike one.

He ran downstairs, only to find Natasha eating quietly in front of the TV. And the baby was on the floor, lying on his stomach and trying to roll over on the carpet.

"Did he fell?" he asked panicked, walking closer to the baby as Natasha glared at him. Strike two.

"Yes, I let him fall" she replied sarcastically and he lifted his hands as the baby cried out, and then giggled "He should know how to roll. He might as well do it on the floor. He's fine, go to work"

"Do you need any help? I could stay"

"Pepper is one call away. FRIDAY keeps an eye on him too and Wanda is coming over in a few. Apparently, she likes babies too. Go on, we'll be fine"

"Fury wanted us to care for him"

"And he gave us a fake life we are supposed to live. If none of us go to work, the neighbors will think we are smugglers. And believe me, there's always the noisy one"

Natasha smiled in victory when he sighed in surrender, picking up the baby from the floor and walking out to say goodbye him as he got into the silver Audi to turn it on, baby perched on her hip.

"Noisy neighbors at my two o'clock. She's been picking on the same weed since we walked out of the house, he's been standing just as long" she stated as Steve got off the car, eyeing them.

"I know you don't need me, but if something happens, call. I'll be here in a beat" He crouched to be eye level with the baby, and tickled his cheeks before kissing his forehead. He stood up slightly, just enough for Natasha to wrap her hand around his neck and bringing him down for a kiss.

"You need to get used to it. I intend on playing the doting wife until I can go back to work" she smirked when he blushed, stuttering a goodbye as he jumped into the car. She saw the noisy neighbors approaching her as Steve backed away from the driveway. "Say bye to Daddy!" she waved the baby's hand and Steve chuckled before driving away.

So far, so good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is techinically the first full length chapter. Like i said, i'm new to the MCU and the awesomeness of their stories so please forgive me if i mess up here and there with the character's background, powers and such. To those that are following. Thank you! -OHP

**Author's Note:**

> AN: So... hi there! I recently got into the entire MU and i absolutely adore my little team of Super Heroes. Especially Nat and Steve!... Let me know what you think of this little preview! -OHP


End file.
